It’s days like these that I wish you could check on me and ask about my day. I have no one I can complain to about the hectic day I’ve had or about this client who made me spend my entire afternoon at the police station. I wish I could call and tell you how frustrated I feel right now.
You always have a way of calming my nerves. When I say I’m tired, you have a response. When I tell you I feel the pressure at work, there you are, with a quick solution to it. When I tell you I’m reaching my limits at work, you have an answer that will make me have second thoughts.
How am I to handle today? Talking to you has always made my day brighter. I love that I can text you when I’m low or frustrated then you make me feel better. I know I’ve complained to you a number of times about wanting to be ‘babied’ – kudekezwa, but you have been doing it so well.
It’s funny how we get to see people differently when they are no longer with us. My moments with you keep replaying in my head sometimes I feel like they are just mocking me to make me regret my silence. Last we stayed this long without talking, I wrote poems after poems for you, wondered whether you loved me, and then cried because I let you go. Please don’t make me go through all this again.
Yours,
N.
Nancy Atieno's Notes 